How to write better self-help books?
This genre is popular but their helpfulness is questionable
The term self-help has never made much sense to me. The self-help section in the bookstore implies that the books in all of the other sections have magical powers, where the work is done for you. The way I see it, if you are an adult, most help is self-help. To buy a book, take a course, or hire an expert are all acts of self-motivation. Unless someone truly forces you to accept help, some part of your self is doing the work.
I try to think of self-help books, at least the good ones, as applied psychology and philosophy. The goal is to write books that help you in practical ways, rather than teach you abstract theory or curious facts that have little effect on your daily life.
That said, many people complain about self help books. Since this project, Rules To Live By, has the goal of helping people, I want to avoid those mistakes if I can. As I mentioned last week I’m focused on planning the rest of this book, and this is part of what I’m thinking about.
I asked on Facebook and LinkedIn why are self-help books disappointing? Here are some of the better answers:
The advice is generic or obvious
Repetitive or long-winded
They expect you will follow their advice perfectly and nothing will go wrong
Self-centered: the author is the star, more than the reader
Based on oversimplifications that apply to the author’s unique circumstances
Pretentious and humorless
Not actionable
Part of the challenge here is we all have different preferences. What’s obvious to you might not be obvious to others (or we need reminders). If you’re a fan of the author, you might tolerate self-centeredness (or enjoy their rambling stories) more than readers who have no idea who they are.
What stands out for you from this list? What’s missing?
I confess I've rummaged through several self-help books and podcasts over the years and what strikes me is that I found the information I needed when I was ready to learn it. It was't the book exactly. Readiness to learn was the magic, and as important, willingness to fail. Any self help guru needs to support failure and how to get back up to keep going.
They do not talk about the failures—where self-help book, or those practical tips and guides fail, how those practitioners fail first, failed again, and then may or may not have failed or succeeded at last. Most of them miss the reality.